Lenny & Tooty

As a kid, and after I became an adult, I had a lot of friends from different age groups, but mostly older..  Lenny was in my age group, we grew up together and we went to the same elementary school. And our friendship  continued into our adult years until Lenny developed a fatal brain tumor, which was discovered after he was in his sixties. 

Lenny look alike, Errol Flynn

Another one was Milf.  Real name, Milford.  Boy oh boy, did he hate that name.  And I agreed with him, it was a terrible name for a kid in that era.  But, I would  not call him John, which is the name he picked out for himself and liked.  To me he just didn't look like a John.   So I called him Milf.     And then, later,  I gave him a nickname that stuck, Tooty.  He had pretty boy looks with black, curly curls all over his head and he was very  well built. Tooty  was not much of a gambler, and never much of a sports playing kid either, except for pool (Billiards) which we all played, for money.  In pool, my best talent was staying out of games where I was over matched and had no chance of winning.  Of course that 'learning curve' was costly.  Whenever the rest of us went to play baseball or other sports Tooty was always somewhere else.
He lived with his parents in an apartment over a fruit store, a business they owned.    His chores, every day, were to get up early, before school, and load the fruit and vegetable stands in front of the store.  When the stands were filled his job was over and he would go to school and do whatever for the rest of the day.. 
He was the reason I tried huckstering.  He convinced me to do it because he could pretty much put a basket full of vegetables under each arm, so he thought anybody could do it.    He told me how much I could make in the alleys selling corn, for example, and how to go down to the  wharf and buy a bushel basket of corn or whatever I wanted to sell.  To me, in my mind, what I was going to do was determined by how much I could make, not on how hard it was to carry the stuff.  What a dumbbell.  Uh, oh.  I'm just putting this stuff down as I write and this post is supposed to be about both Lenny and Tooty.. 

Lenny had what was considered the classic good looks of the day.  Very masculine, he had to shave already, and he looked older, so most girls were as impressed with him as they were with Tooty.  Tooty had pretty boy, no beard, 'Tyrone Power', type looks, while Lenny was more in the 'Erroll Flynn' category.  

Further down, from where Tooty lived, on Sixtieth Street, near Spruce Street, known as  the drugstore corner where the downtown trolley turned east before stopping to pick-up passengers, there was another fruit store with a stand outside. The apartments on the second and third floors, atop this fruit store, were empty.  So a group of us, including both Lenny and Tooty, made a lease deal with the owner.  If he would fix the 2nd floor apartment into one long room.     It had a bath at the far end.  When the knocking down of the walls was finished we rented it from him for a year and it became our club house.  The club dues were pretty much for paying the rent.  Soon it had two sofas, one along each wall, and a table on one side with a small Bakelite radio on its rectangular top.  Also on top was a separate Philco turntable, which played dance music records.  The audio was played through the radio.. 
We used the club mostly for gambling.  We shot craps against the walls, we played cards, and we did all kinds of other gambling stuff.  While I was not a good card player, the rest of the members were terrible.  And I was a good learner, so I learned how to play gin, pinochle, hearts and a little bridge.  I was a terrible poker player because I could not stay out of a hand, and that continued to cost me as I got older.  But later when I was invited to play in higher stakes poker games, I just didn't play. Guys who cant stay out of hands, just get killed. 
Over the weekends we tried to convince girls to come up and (?) dance.  It became such a headache to the owner that he told us he wasn't going to renew the lease.  And then at the end of the year he went and  rented the club to a jealous rival gang who were all from a little outside of our neighborhood.  I think the landlord did this because we caused him so much trouble with noise and other misbehavior stuff and . . they paid him a little more rent.

There were three memorable incidents that happened at the club.  One was, we convinced this Tooty girl she could become a member of the club if she made out with every member of the club,. 
A 'Tooty girl' . . .whenever we went to a dance, Tooty would wait until dancing was well underway and then he would ask one of the 'not yet' dancing girls, to dance.  Sometimes he would wait until there was only one girl  not dancing.  When he was asked about his selections, he responded with, "Did your score yesterday?  I did." His selections became known as Tooty girls.
So Tooty convinced this Tooty girl she had to go through 'hazing' in order to join the club.  After (almost) every member got into her pants.  She got the nickname, 'Fish'.  And she was allowed to come up to the club whenever another member were present.  It was her  fascination with Tooty.  After that, a lot of times, when you went up the stairs and into the club room, you would notice her on the far couch mostly all mixed up with another member. 

Its not one of my favorite memories because  I realize now she just wanted to be with everybody else.  Its not an excuse.  Its was just the way kids like us did stuff.   Just like today, kids don't understand real consequences caused by doing stuff.  And, of course mostly because they don't want to..

Look! Look!  I got one.

Anyway a coupla weeks after she started coming upstairs we noticed Fred scratching himself like crazy and we kept telling  him to cut it out when one member said, "What the hell is the matter with you?  You got the crabs or something?"  
It was just something someone said out loud.  I don't know about anybody else, but crabs were something I had no clue about and I didn't want the other guys to know I was ignorant about the subject..
Well anyway, by this time we knew how to get into the third floor apartment, which had several rooms, and in one of them there was an old rickety table and some chairs.  And also by this time there was only one or two members of the club who had  not made out with the Fish. .  One of them was selected to go upstairs and help see who was infected.  We got him a magnifying glass.   I don't know where the hell it came from.  Looking back the result was hilarious. 
One by one we went up and sat on edge of the table with our pants down, and got examined under the magnifying glass.  When we came down, we sent another guy up.  The funny thing is the only other guy who had not been with the Fish, was Fred.   But he wanted to go up too and ironically, he was the guy who started the whole thing..  He was a wannabe member whose parents tried to keep a tight hold on him, and he wasn't allowed out much.  Anyway, no one thought it was necessary for him to go up for an exam because he was not the type.  He was, what we called a square.  His father was a lawyer and they had a house on 62nd and Larchwood Avenue.  Their house had an enclosed porch and the  furniture in it was more valuable than any of us had in our entire home, except maybe Lenny.  And they had a full time housekeeper every day of the week except Sunday. 
There was this thing about Fred, he was what you call hairy.  He had hair all over the place and especially on his chest and body.  Anyway he kept insisting and insisting he wanted to go up, until someone asked, "What harm is there?"  So he became the last examinee.   A couple of minutes after he went up we hear a shout.  We all run upstairs to the exam room..  There was Fred, practically naked, sitting on the table, and even from the doorway, you could see he was covered with something.  He had crabs all over.  Even in the hair in his arm pits.
By now we all knew what we were looking for and why.   No wonder he wanted to go upstairs. 
So we collected some money and sent someone to the drugstore, it was only about a block or so away.  The gofer bought and returned with some bottles of Cuprex.  I think that was the name.  We gave one bottle to Fred, he had supplied a dollar of the money and he needed the stuff the most.  We used the other bottles for every one else to use..  Medicinal prices in those days were still reasonable.



Afterward, Fred said he started putting Cuprex on his shoulders and by the time he got to the top of his legs he could see them beginning to fall off.  Which reminds me  of a joke I learned when I was a kid.  I may have put a sanitized version of this joke in an earlier post on my blog.  Goes like this.......

Cute little bugger

'To cure the crabs, you start with a bottle of alcohol and a magnifying mirror.  You rub a liberal amount of alcohol onto your  private parts area and put the magnifying mirror on the floor.  Then, after you wait a little while, so the crabs have time to consume the alcohol, you stand over the mirror, legs wide apart.   Make sure you give the crabs enough time to get drunk.  Then, when they look down and see these much larger private parts, they will jump down, eager to be on the bigger pair of testicles, and kill themselves when they land on the hard glass of the mirror.'
Oh yeah, Fred's explanation was, he was messing around with the housekeeper.
In one of the other  two incidents Lenny was featured.  It was a fist fight between the toughest kid in the club that now occupied our old clubhouse, and Lenny.  At first we thought Tooty would fight the guy, but they tossed a coin and Lenny won. (Or lost)  Lenny and this other kid went into the middle of 60th street and beat the hell out of each other with Lenny declared the winner when his opponent quit.  He said he thought he had broken his leg.. The fist fight in the middle of sixtieth was the talk of the neighborhood for months afterward because quite a few passersby paused to watch.  And Lenny became a local hero.

The next thing happened after the new club took over, they took extra care to lock the club up when they left.  And they let this guy sleep there as a way of guarding the place by keeping someone inside.   I  knew the watcher and it was not unusual for him to take me up to keep him company.



They hadn't made too many changes and the watcher showed me where they kept a 22 revolver.  It was hidden in the back of their record player. I kept telling everybody they kept a gun up there.  But they didn't believe me and pooh poohed it.  So one night when no guard was in the place, one of our guys jimmied the lock and about six of us went up to the second floor.  In those days the gun manufacturers hadn't bought the leaders of the NRA, if there was one, so guns were a rarity. Except those I saw in the movies, I had never seen a real gun.

Toy Capgun

It was almost pitch black in there with just a little illumination coming thru a window from a street lamp outside, on Sixtieth St. ..  It really was dark, but I went over and found the record player,  and put my hand into the back, under the turntable.  Sure enough there it was, still there.  I pulled the gun out.   It looked small, like a toy.  When the other guys saw the gun, they all started saying stuff like  "Ahh its a toy. Are  you kidding?  Its a cap gun."   It really got me going, so I said loudly, "Its a cap gun is it?  Its a toy is it?"  And then I pointed the gun at the far bathroom wall . . . and pulled the trigger.  BAM!!!!   Oh my goodness, it sounded like a clap of thunder. The room was basically empty except for the sofas which were certainly not large enough to absorb the sound.  It reverberated off the walls and scared the hell out of everyone.  Me too.  We thought you could hear it a block away.  We were just kids.   You never saw a faster scramble to get the hell out of there.  We jammed at the doorway and down the narrow stairs to get out of the building.  Whooo.  Afterwards nobody knew what happened to the gun but I found out later.   Tooty got it.  And he  made me promise not to tell anybody. 

This stuff has turned out to be  longer than I thought it would, so I think I will save Lenny's story to make another post.

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Santa (Repost)

While talking to me at Moore Park in Miami, where I was teaching tennis
as  a volunteer, a father of some kids  tells me he is Hebrew.  I say, "Great, the kids don't have enough problems being black."

Counting his kids and some cousins there are 7 non-Santa believing kids, out of the more than 100 kids at the tennis center.. The Christmas holiday is looming and the park program will be closed for 2 weeks.

One of the father's 3 daughters  (ages 7 to 11) says to me, "Coach Howard, I heard you talking, do you believe in Santa Claus?"

Shamyim, Toby, Rishona  December 2010

I look furtively to my left, then furtively to my right, and then, with the same intense look, I turn and look behind me.  Then I lower  my voice and I say, softly,


"When I was a kid I found out if you didn't believe in Santa, you didn't get any presents."  The kids are looking at me, puzzeled.
Then I ask the oldest, Shamayim, "Do you guys believe in Santa?"  She says,
"No."

Then I ask her, "Do you get any presents at Christmas time?"  She says,

"No".  I say,     
"See . . . . . . . ."

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Obama lied!!!

First family official picture.

While making speeches for the Affordable Care Act, Obama said, if you want to keep the health insurance you have now, you will be able to do it.  Then, the insurance companies started sending cancellation notices to their policy owners, saying the reason they were cancelling the policy was, the Obama Health Care Plan.  And that was true because this kind of rip-off policy is not permitted under Obama Care. Some Republicans  say what they say just to attack the president.  They do not say anything positive about the president and use sound bites to keep the public's mind set from understanding how hard it was to bring us back from the impending disaster that was facing our country and the entire world in 2008.
Even the Economist missed it when they commented that 'more Americans were kicked off their old insurance plans despite what the president had said about keeping your insurance plan.   I expect better from the Economist.  Obviously they don't have a consumer insurance correspondent.  Along with the entire U.S media, they don't get it.    What does getting kicked off mean???  Are you ready?  You may still be insurable.  Before Obama Care that would be great for you.  Because it stops them from kicking you off at a time when they do it to many long time premium payers when they have  health care issues..   Like when they are  uninsurable.. Under the Obama Care program, insurance companies can't do that.
Obama Care does not permit insurance companies from their long time practice of using odious methods of screwing the public.  Ignoring this, the Republicans jumped on what he said in order to take another shot at the black guy.   Which is like accusing a person with cruelty to animals because he was a little rough when he restrained a dog in order to prevent the dog from getting run over by a car or a bus.   So what else is new?  And the press jumped on what he said without any intelligent investigation.  Even the president can't stop an insurance company from executing a cancel clause in a policy.  They do it that way because while it is morally wrong, it is  not illegal.
So, the real question is, "Who the hell would want a cancelable policy, if he/she understood what it meant to have one?" 
And why or when would the company want to cancel your policy anyway?  This is  the most important question, overlooked by media 'experts'.  
The fast answer is, "If you don't make a claim, maybe never."  Of course if you do  make a claim, the answer changes to; "As soon as it becomes profitable for the insurance company to do so."  
When is that?   Read and reread this because except for the Grace of GOD you are not one of the many, many 'former' policyowners who had their insurance taken away from them (cancelled) after they got sick, or maybe made a small claim for stuff like high blood pressure or diabetes..  And now, after many years of paying premiums, to the same company, and thinking they had good health insurance, they take the coverage away.  And you find yourself not only without insurance, but yes,  now you are uninsurable.  For many, a bleak prospect indeed.  The cost of using health care in this country can bankrupt almost anybody.  And if an insurance company can get out of paying a claim, what do YOU think they will they do ???
I daresay one of the primary benefits of Obama Care is the FACT that it cannot be taken away from you for any reason relating to your health condition.. Yes, I am repeating it, like they do, at Fox News Channel, with their orchestrated sound bites.
However, it is my considered opinion that the insurance companies, they already have their lawyers and their favorite politicians, and of course their lobbyists, and their sound biters, figuring out how to enact laws so that they can keep doing stuff to screw the public. I mean after all, where is their bonus money going to come from?

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LaPierre & Loonies

When I was a kid I had a friend, Irv Mamet, who could make musical sounds using his mouth.  He could do riffs with the best of them.  He could imitate a saxophone and do riffs like Ella Fitzgerald did in a song or, he would pick up odd implements, like sticks from trees and then use them as drumsticks.  He could not only do drum rolls he could beat out amazing para-diddles. 
Trouble was, while he wasn't doing stuff like that he would be patting you on your arms or other parts and mumbling and he was always kidding around in a nutty way..  One day he got talking to a couple of guys and he called me over and said to me, "Howard you know I'm not nuts, will you tell these guys I'm not crazy."  Afterwards, I took him aside, and

Twas the day after Santa,  not a bad guy in site,
the presents were opened and the smiles were bright.

here's what I said to him, "Wait a minute Irv.  Let me ask you a question.  Don't you fool around most of the time??  He says, " Yes ,that's my point.  You know I'm just fooling around."  Ok, I answered, but don't you do it, like more than 50% of the time.?"
"Well, yeah, I guess so."
"Well Irv, then I'm afraid that if you are acting nuts more than 50% of the time then even if  you are not nuts, you qualify for being called  nuts" 
But wait a minute, lets make sure we all know what we are doing before we label him unqualified for a gun license. . . . . When I was younger and when things were getting a little hairy and I needed someone intelligent to talk to,  I started talking to myself.  I mean after all its not easy to find an intelligent ear.  And I do have 2 of those..  Specifically, this happened mostly when I was alone in my car.  I found it an easy way to think and started including the Man Upstairs in the conversation. You know, when sorting things out became difficult.  Between us we could solve almost anything.    
However, when I stopped at a stoplight and if you drove up beside me, you might think, 'look at that loony talking to himself'.' The Man Upstairs,  He  fixed it.  He found a little company making a little gadget, you could hold it in your hand, it played lots of songs. and then He steered this guy Jobs, who was running Apple,  to buy this little company and show the gadget to the world.   Anyway the next thing you know a lot of kids are carrying one around and listening to music.   And if you used an ear plug you could put the gadget on your arm or in your pocket. You could listen to music while you were exercising, like running, or riding a bike.  Wow!
I know you know this stuff but here is the thing, I consider the ipod the greatest invention since someone thought of sleeping on an air mattress instead of the ground, when you were out camping.  Just blow it up. Amazing.  Only trouble was, the gadgets were expensive.
But, now what happened is this.  A 'Job' like case of entrepreneurialism hit me like a bolt.  I went out and bought a set  of headphones for an ipod,   No ipod, too much money, just the earphones.  It had wires running from your ears to; your gadget?
So now, when  you pull up beside me, there I am with an earphone in my ear and a colorful wire hanging down, and you think, 'there goes another music lover, singing along.  I wonder who he's listening to?
But I'm not listening to anybody.  I'm talking to myself, or the Man Upstairs.  The other end of the headphone wire is in my pocket or hanging loose.  Brilliant.  No way I will loose my qualification for a gun license.  And today, if I'm talking to the Man Upstairs and  driving, nobody pays any attention.

Newest NRA member

But talking about loonies, the real, real looney out there is this guy who has engineered a take- over of the leadership of the NRA,   I don't think he could get the NRA presidency on a real membership vote, because anybody can see he's, like I said,  a looney.  At first I thought he was just doing this stuff for the money.  (Which he is)  but like Irv, this guy is behaving like a looney way more than 50% of the time.  So I think that's the real reason he's against background checks.  He doesn't want to get found out officially.  I mean this guy can't have all his marbles.  You can't say the stuff he says and qualify for a gun license.  In other words, he's protecting himself from loosing his license to carry a gun, because he thinks a background check on  him will out him as a nut.  Now how is that going to look?

.....Good guy? . . .Or. bad guy? .

One example.  Examine his advice on getting the bad guys. He says, "The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is, with a good with a gun."  I think this qualifies him for a stay behind an iron fence.  I mean lets take two of his friends.  Like the guy in the picture.  If they are friends of his they are considered good guys.  Right?  And of course they have guns?  Right?  Instantly ready to stop any bad guy.  Right?  But suppose they get into an argument themselves.  And it gets to the 'Stand your ground' stage.  Either one can whip out a gun lickety split.  So the other guy has to defend himself and before you know it . . ..  .  BOOM!  
So, here is the difficult question..  . Is the dead guy a good guy or a bad guy?  And how bout the guy who is left over?  What the hell?  What a mess.  And all because of this LaPierre guy.   He don't need that license as much as we need to put him in a cage.

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Super Bowl,1972



 



Dolphin team.  Coach Shula, right (sitting)

In the Herald I read that the Miami Dolphins football team was invited to the White House to be presented with an award by the  President of the United States.  As everyone knows the Miami Dolphins  won the Super Bowl and were undefeated for the entire 1972 season.  Wow!  I saw some of those games at the stadium.  And I saw the Super bowl on TV.  (Garo, Garo, be careful!) Wow again!
And then I read in the Herald that some players, who played on the '72 team, were not going to go to the shindig.  I wondered why. While I was watching some of the games in '72, when I saw a good tackle, or a spectacular play, it never crossed my mind to wonder if the player was a Republican or a Democrat.  Would any of you guys have accepted the award if it was from the Cheney etc. administration?  I certainly hope so.  Even though, as a VP, Cheney sure sucked.
Or maybe its Obama Care you don't like.  If it is, that should mean you understand Obama Care or you think you understand it.  If that's the case maybe you can explain it to me.  Its easy for politicians to speak positively or negatively about stuff, but ball players?  Would you believe that when Social Security was enacted some people were so upset they said worse things about Social Security than people are saying now about the Affordable Care Act. (Obama Care)
Or maybe you guys think Obama was not born in this country.  If you do, here, you have the Donald on your side.  Trump is not looking so good lately but I don't think he will go to jail like Martha Stewart.  He probably won't even get into trouble.  Except for the President, most important people are afraid to get into his lying mouth. After all he's only accused of being part of a scheme, that is bilking millions from the government.  Bilking  Taking tuition money from a federal veterans school program.  Like the governor of Florida's company which was fined 1.7 billion dollars.  How much do you think Trump's phony Academy will get fined? 
On the other hand, Martha Stewart, she went to jail.  Unbelievable!! 
Would any of you not go, and/or not accept induction into the NFL Hall Of Fame, just because a political figure was going to be part of the award celebration?.. 
In other words, whether or not you learned how to think when you went to college, if you don't agree with some policies of the administration, that is ok.  It is your right.  But following that logic, you do go to the ceremony because of past happenings in our country caused by then administrations.  Yesterdays administrations, and todays administrations, and tomorrow's administratons,  as a governing entity, they're all the same.  You shouldn't have to approve all of an administration's policies in order to receive an honor from your country for doing stuff. 

So as I see it, you do not pass up an opportunity to receive an honor from your Country for something you should be proud of. In your case, as a member of that great undefeated Miami Dolphin team..It was your Country when Nixon was president. It was your Country when Ford was President. It was your Country when Reagan was President, and it was your Country each time we had a Bush for President,  and it was your Country when Clinton was President.  And it is still your Country right now, when, dare I say it, Obama is President.



Want out here too?

I don't understand why the other Presidents didn't bestow an honor on the team for that achievement.  Possibly, using your logic, maybe, just maybe, they thought there were too many 'voting' players on the team that would vote for the other political party.  And I'm a little confused on how you would decide which President would have to have your approval in order for you to accept recognition for something the team did..  Do you think all of the team members that went to the ceremony agree with everything that is being done by the present administration?  Shame on you.  I'm sure the team will not mind if I say this to you.  And I surely do hope you can hear me,  "You missed it."

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Come out, come out wherever U are.





 

The show on TV featured an interview with an internationally known doctor renowned for his ground breaking work on the subject of memory. The doctor was explaining, to the camera, that this television program was a demonstration and it was part of his investigation into unusual memory, sometimes known as photographic memory. "You will witness the unexplained phenomenal ability of some people to use their memory.  I will challenge my 5 guests who are also volunteers in my study, by having them tell us what happened on random dates and then we will check their answers against Google.  That way we will see how accurate their answers are."

He then calls out a date, say, September the 8th, 1995.  The person to answer first stands and says, "That was a Monday", and then he says what the headlines or what newsworthy events occurred on that day. 

The monitor of the computer comes into view and shows the information a Google  search of that date had discovered. Indeed, the computer screen monitor  shows the answer covers every news item of significance occurring on that date. 

Each of the other guests then stood up one by one and gave a similar performance. This was research and there was no reason for it to be a trick.  I was flabbergasted.


When the questioning of the guests was over the doctor continues the interview and he explains the nature of his study and how much new information about the brain was now available, and how, by using faster and faster computers, new ways to understand how memory and the brain work together are being revealed..  He said that what we had just seen was a demonstration of  memory from people who were born with this amazing ability.  After that he said that there are other circumstance that seem to trigger unusual memory activity.  Usually by a very traumatic event in a person's life.  I have had such a happening and memory return. but the unusual memory returned to me seems to be confined to my childhood.  With  much detail I can visualize events that happened in my childhood as if they had very recently occurred.. But, somethings I don't mind forgetting.  Like when I was in a hospital and they gave me my medicine in orange juice.  Whose idea was that anyway.  Ugh!  It made orange juice taste as if it had caster oil in it for many years into my adult life..  But my memory for recent stuff is tricky.  Sometimes good, sometimes bad. 



Human cane. (Out of stock)

 I have to use a cane to keep pressure off my  leg and back. My first cane likes to play tricks and hide, so to be sure I always have a cane, I have 3 canes.   Cane number #1 is my favorite.  Cane #2 and cane #3 are backups and as I write this,  cane #1 has gone missing.   So I am using cane #2.    And of course cane #3 is my safety valve.  But I'm  not buying  another cane, #4, because I think cane #1 is just waiting for me to buy it so he can come out from wherever the hell she is hiding.

  But all kinds of other stuff from my childhood are very clear.   Like when I was in school, I was always talking, which was  annoying to my eighth grade history teacher.  She kept her class orderly and if you disrupted classroom decorum, she put you in the last seat in the first row by the wall with the chalkboard and door.  Naturally that meant she had the student, who got the highest grade in a test, sitting in the first seat, in the row by the windows.  Very near to her desk in the front of the room.    On the first major test (there would be 3 major tests)  I got a 97.  She liked what I wrote but she penalized me for leaving out two periods..  I told her I thought that was unfair, this was history, not English.  You're right, I was a smartass then too.  Anyway since the next highest test score was 93, it meant for me, the first seat in the row by the windows, right at her desk..  My tucas never hit the seat because she switched me to the last seat of the first row for talking on the way to the front of the room. After the first test I got sick and I was out of school for almost a month.  When I came back to school it was just in time to take the second test.  I got a 68 and I could see the relief in her face.  But the third and final test subject was about Napoleon.  I had read four or five books on Napoleon, including War And Peace.  I got 99.  Only one period this time and she didn't take the other half a point.    Highest mark again, but I did not want that front seat.  To me it was a penalty, but, after I got it,  I was determined she was not going to get me out of it.  I walked to the seat practically on my tippee toes.  The teacher had a habit of looking out of the window and every time she did so, when she turned back to the class, there I was.  Whenever I noticed it I would smile.  I could almost smell the wood burning in her head.  We both knew she had to get me out of there.  I lasted two school days, on my third day in the first seat she called Pete, (my best talking buddy) to her desk.  He was only there for a minute or two when she told the class to behave while  she went into the hall.  Before she came back I got Pete's eye and shook my head at him pointing to my lips.  A short time later a teacher's aide comes into class and she tells the teacher she is wanted in the principal's office which was a few doors down the hallway.  The teacher told us to behave again and left the room putting the aide in charge.  Now come on, it was not my fault.  There is no way a fourteen year old talkative kid can control his tongue under those circumstances.  The door opened and she came back into the classroom. Neither of us said anything.   I just got up with my things and went to the last seat which was unoccupied.  But she did give me an 'A' for the semester. Please register you reaction by checking a box below.You can sign a comment with your face-book or twitter signature.

 

 

The Law






 

Va. Gov.  What's this stuff?

Apparently the governor of Virginia has broken the law.  And as bad as it looks for him, it might be getting even worse. He took stuff, money and things, in  return for favors that only he, the governor, could bestow.  These  favors were to the same individual who gave him money and its the same guy who also gave gifts to his family..  The governor does not seem to be in danger of going to jail for this but some convicts are where they are now, in the slammer, for breaking similar laws.  They got prosecuted.  But the governor thinks he's entitled to a 'get out of jail free card' because he is the governor of Virginia.
So he is returning some of the gifts he received, and some of the money his family took.  You know, so the law enforcers, they should leave  him alone..  Hmm.  Lets see, Virginia's Attorney General is a cohort of his and he is also a Republican, and apparently he has a dirty hands problem of his own. . So can anyone depend on him to enforce the law?  Equally?. . .  This is a nice kettle of fish, huh?.   I wonder how many cons would get out of jail if we allowed them the same standard of law enforcement the governor wants for himself.   But I think he is in real trouble because its all petty stuff.  Not so many zeros.  And I love his nickname. Governor Vaginal Probe.
Still, governors have to put their hands on bibles and swear to uphold the law, don't they? Well, maybe he forgot.  Or maybe for him to put his hand on a bible and swearing to something is the same as him not putting his hand on a bible and swearing to something.   
Maybe he doesn't' know what us citizens think when our officials do stuff like that.  Guess what governor?

When you swear on a  bible, that's heavy stuff and we have a perception that 'what you are saying is truthful' and that you are going to honor what you say.    Maybe in Virginia they think that swearing-in stuff is just some ritual for the TV cameras..  
The more I learn about Virginia's officials the more their governor reminds me of other GOP governors, especially the governor of Florida.  They both seem to think being associated with lawless behavior is ok, and that wandering down this path doesn't negatively affect their political stature.   
When I was a kid it was not unusual for me to sneak into the movies.  Without realizing it maybe I was getting myself prepped to be a Republican and then, somewhere, I just took a wrong (or right) turn in the road.
But what is it with these GOP governors and law breaking?  
Lets take our governor, you know, the guy who took the 5th 75 times because he thought it would keep him out of jail, here, in Florida.  He built a business that was so sturdy it could withstand a fine of a billion and half dollars. Wooo. Oooo.  Now that's some trick.  Makes the  Virginia gov look like a piker.  And his company deserved that fine because they were caught defrauding, and overbilling and otherwise stealing money from Medicare and Medicaid.
Stories in the Miami Herald are regularly reporting on people getting caught doing this poop.  In fact, so many crooks are stealing from Medicaid it seems like its almost the 'crime de jour' in South Florida..    One of the governor's supporters, trying to drum up votes during the election, said to me, no one was more qualified to come up with legislation to stop this kind of poop.  He said it with a straight face, too.  Well, I'm still waiting for corrective legislation.. 
And, far as I know, culpable people are still allowed to work for companies that were fined.   What?  How does that make sense?  Does anyone think people who do this stuff even want to forget how to do what they did?  I think they just get better at hiding it.
I think I can help here, you know, with an real idea or two.  Like, 'all culpable employees, along with all executive officers of a  company fined for bilking Medicaid and Medicare, be prohibited from working for any company who sends bills to Medicaid or Medicare.  For a period of five or ten years.'  And another one.  'All bills submitted to Medicare and/or Medicaid require a signed, under penalty, statement that the person submitting the bill does not know of any inflated or otherwise wrongful charges on the bill.'  Hey Soose, its so easy if you want to do something.
What gets me is, here are these self righteous GOPers pontificating about how much Medicare and Medicaid is costing us taxpayers, (they do this as a tactic, so you will vote for them I guess), when all the time a lot of the cost comes from their misbehavior.   How can we expect them to pass sensible new legislation to prevent this kind of stuff when some of them are profiting from it?
I think, our governor should open a few foreign off-shore bank accounts and put a pet on top of his car when he goes on vacation trips.  Then he might be eligible for inclusion in the next GOP primary.  To me he's a  perfect fit with that last GOP presidential primary group.  Hey, if he makes the GOP primary I just thought of a good slogan for him . . . 10,10,10.  
And don't these GOP governors realize a lot of jobs are in jeopardy?  As an example, some of the proposals they are suggesting are threatening jobs, and some of those job losses are from the future of the newest 'aroma technology'.  
Just think, with Florida's governor wanting people to 'pee in bottles' and the Virginia governor wanting pregnant women to have 'vaginal probes' with electronic equipment,  the entire future of 'smell-o-vision' is in jeopardy.

Here is a trivia question for ya, "How many former governors of Illinois are in the slammer?"  I think that last guy made a critical error when he ran as a Democrat. He should have gotten elected as a Republican.  Selling job appointments?  For them?  A Piece of cake.  That's just job training for when they become lobbyists.

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Martha

Martha Stewart was sent to jail?  Lovely Martha? Stewart?  She went to jail?  She is home now, thank the lord, but its still hard for me to get my brain around this.  To me Martha Stewart represents the ability for any of us, as an individual, to attain the heights of business success in our country.  In other words all that good opportunity stuff about our country.
She doesn't need praise from me.  Or sympathy from me for the difficulty that was foisted upon her.  Just the thought of it sickens me. 
She is a wonder and now she has been forced to represent an example of the spirit necessary to overcome some of the man-made poop that anyone of us can fall into..
I remember thinking at the time, "You can't put Martha Stewart in jail.  Even if she spit on the sidewalk in Philadelphia."  (They repealed that law.)  So I figured she must have done something terrible. 
Damn!!!  They put Martha  in Jail.  And this is not a joke, right?   It wasn't publicity for some of that stuff she sells in TV ads, or in department stores.  I cant conjure up a picture of Martha doing something terrible.  So I did some research.  Maybe she was demonstrating one of her recipes and accidently mixed up some bad stuff with the other ingredients . . . .
What???  She did what? 
Throughout my entire business life my best friend, Jerry, once a Wall Street account executive, and later an officer for Morgan Stanley, like many other so called 'account executives', he would call me on the phone and tout various stocks. All of them were all hoping to get me to buy or sell something.  So they could make a buck.  If we  leave Jerry out of the equation, I knew some of the callers could have only been on the job for a week or maybe just a day.  Sometimes the ones that called, that I didn't know, were brand new hires trying to build a customer base, and, oh yeah, like I said, trying to get me to buy or sell something.  That was how they made their living.  And I think they still do it the same way.  And if luck had it and I bought a stock that went up, I got another sales phone call.

In other words, as I get it,  a Wall Street guy, who Martha knew for a long time, called her on the phone. It was one of those 'can I make a buck ' phone calls.
The law was suspicious of this guy because they thought 'maybe' he was using inside stuff to make sales.  But she thought of him as a friend and she didn't want to get him into trouble.  So she answered these' paragons of virtue' in that context.  Her guard was down.  Calls like this, had happened this way, so many times before, no way she thought anything wrong was involved.
And what difference is the amount of shares? 100 or 1000 or 10 million?  Or if the stock was in her company or my company or any company?  This is so ridiculous.  But she went to JAIL.  If you put everybody in jail who called people like me on the phone to sell me some stock, using terms like 'confidential information', wall street could  solve the 'jobs' problem just by hiring replacements for the all the Wall Street jailbirds.

And then, these virtuous paragons, who will do anything to advance their own careers, decided they could use the notoriety of Martha's name.  Real butt holes who felt safe doing it.  Its rare when someone, just like them, like that butthole sheriff, who ruined the reputations of those kids from the Duke Lacrosse team, pays any kind of penalty. Like that sheriff did. 
I put the butt holes that perpetrated Martha's miscarriage of justice in the same category.

Who's next ?

If stupidity needs an example, this is it. 
Martha went to jail?  Martha Stewart?  Unbelievable!!!
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Charlie Schwartz

Bayshore 17th, Alton Rd, Miami Beach

My first meeting with Charlie Schwartz was at Bayshore Golf Course.  He was having lunch  with an attorney who was part of a firm with offices in the same building on Lincoln Road, where I had my offices.  This day the lawyer got a business call and asked me if I would play with Charlie since he had to take care of business.  Charlie and I agreed to play a round. We liked each other right from the start and it was an enjoyable round with me winning one way.  Since the attorney was not going to be available for a week or so, I continued to play with Charlie for the rest of the week and then we continued playing together after that. 
Charlie was from Philadelphia where he was well known among the gambling fraternity as a high roller and he had a reputation as being very reliable as well as an astute gambler..  He knew my father though they had never socialized.
A story goes that when two rival mob factions in Philadelphia were in the midst of a squabble over $20,000.00 they agreed to put up the money ($20,000.00 cash) with Charlie who would give it to the winner when the dispute was settled.  The dispute took a couple of months. But that is the way it went down, and Charlie gave the winner the money. 
I told Charlie I would not play for more than $25.00 a way.  Usually there was no way Charlie would play for such a small amount.  But I wouldn't budge, and finally he agreed.  We played automatic presses after every 2 holes and the amount of the first bet was established before we teed off.  When I wasn't playing with Charlie my bet limit was $10.00 a way because I didn't want any hustlers making me a target.  At Bayshore you might get taken, even in small games.   It was rare to lose more than 3 or 4 ways a side, (9 holes)  so you do the math.  Charlie could not beat me even with the handicap I gave him.  A  shot a hole and a half shot on the par 3s.  And I insisted we add a stroke or subtract a stroke after every round, depending on who won.  Funny thing, he didn't want to do it. The lawyer was better than me and had a good thing going.
One of Charlie's golfing buddies was Carroll Rosenbloom, former owner of a NFL football team, who also had a high roller reputation, and when he was in South Florida Charlie would play with him..  They would play for $25,000.00 for a nine hole round. No presses. One of their famous rounds was for $50,000.00 and was played on a Boca Raton golf course with a gallery of watchers.   I was told Charlie won the round, when Carroll missed a putt and Charlie made a putt on the last hole.
Both of them were in their later years and were short of stature.  Charlie couldn't hit the ball more than 125 yards but it almost always went straight down the middle and he was decent around the green..  And Carroll could not hit it much further than that and he was also decent around the greens..  Carroll's wife (much younger) became owner of the NFL football team when  Carroll died in the surf off of a Broward County beach. 

Amongst some other stuff  Charlie owned Hamid's Pier in Atlantic City.  The pier and everything else he owned was in his brother Harry's name because of Charlie's unfavorable reputation within the law enforcement community.   Even Charlie's car, an Oldsmobile 98, which he didn't drive, but even what was essentially his wife's car, was in Harry's name.

Charlie's heart trouble flared up and while he was in the hospital he told me he might want to sell Hamid's Pier and he asked me for advice on how to go about it.  During those visits to the  hospital I met some friends of  his and one of them,  lived in Bal Harbour,  He was often present during most of my visits.  What I said to Charlie was, if he trusted Harry not to take advantage of his wife, he could just let matters be and make with some type of agreement between harry and his wife.  But if he wanted to be sure, his best option was to sell.  He asked me if I would make a meet with him and Harry, at the hospital, to discuss it.  We had the meeting, the Bal Harbour friend was there too, and Charlie asked me how long it would take.  I said I would get on it right away so probably not too long, and that I would get some ball  park numbers as to value in about a week at the most.  Harry was just agreeable to everything in a submissive way.


To establish a price  I contacted 2 well known realtors, one in Philadelphia, one in Atlantic City, and then got the names of some potential buyers from a friend of my friend, Jerry.  (the pier was eventually sold for nearly a million dollars.)  Jerry's friends owned a Hotel on Ventnor avenue which was later purchased by Trump and is now Trump Tower.  
Not long after, before the sale was finalized, Charlie passed away..

Hamid's Pier, 1930s, its heyday.

To shorten the story, Harry turns out to be less than what Charlie had hoped.  He told Charlie's wife even the car did not belong to her.  A one hundred percent pure asshole.
I knew Charlie's Bal Harbour friend was aware of all of this stuff and when I saw him, he asked me how my part of the story went and I told him.   I also told him was I going to sue Harry for a fee at the time, especially when I heard how he treated Charlie's wife.  And then I went to visit her and she told me Harry had unexpectedly given her some money and she was satisfied.  So I didn't sue, I chalked it up, as far as my efforts were concerned, to another of life's experiences. 
And then he said, "If it makes you feel better I'll tell you what happened. I spoke to Harry.  I asked if he knew two mutual friends from South Jersey?"  And he said,  "Sure." 
Then I asked him, "You wouldn't want them wanting to talk to you?  Would ya?" 
He got alarmed and asked, "Why the hell would they want to talk to me?"  And then I  asked him if he didn't remember an incident many years ago when Charlie did a favor for them.  Harry says sure he rememberes.  So I say, then you probably also remember they liked his wife, and that they had sent her a very nice present when Charlie did the favor.
That's when I said, "Oh I see.  And here I thought he had a change of heart." 

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Crime and Me

My life in crime started way back when.  I don't remember how old I was but I think it was about the time  I started to  notice girls. Especially the girl who lived a few houses up on my street.  And she knew I noticed her because I would look at her a certain way.  In those days I was beginning to be a kibbitser and was a little bold.  And I did that because of how she walked and  how she wore her low cut dresses, or revealing tops.. This was not the routine way girls wore their clothes in those days. Anyway I was at the corner drug store waiting for someone to get a phone call.  When they did  I would go 'call them to the phone', for which I would  get  a tip.  Maybe a nickel or an occasional dime.. 

Ultimate price

On this day I wanted to go to the movies.    They were having burlesque as part of the show, and this was the way I would get the money for admission.  And there were  no restrictions applying to me because of my age.  (see below)But today was a bad day for phone calls and I was about to leave the store when a call came in for that lady who  lived a little up the block. I ran to her house and knocked on the door and waited.  Jeez, maybe nobody was home.  I was leaving, already on the top step of her stoop, when I heard a noise from behind the door which then opened and there she was.  I didn't even see her face.  She was wearing a kimono which is like a negligee, I think.  But you cant see through it.  No matter, she was buttoning it up from the bottom and she still had four or five buttons to go. Wow.  I told her about the phone call and I could tell by the look in her face she might not have a nickel for me. I don't remember the words I used but I quickly told her no tip was necessary. She swooped me into her bosom with a bear hug.  Wow again. Worth way more than a nickel or dime. 

But that was that, she went to the drug store and I went to the Cross Keys Theater on Market street to try to find a way to see the movie and special show.  I went to the back of the building looking for a way to get in.  One of the exit doors was about a quarter inch away from flat against the building.  I found a popsicle stick and used it so it would push against the latch, which I pushed until it clicked back against the door.  

Then I moved the door out until it reached an unclosed position and I held it that way by pushing the popsicle stick across the bottom of the latch. Pressure from the door held it in place and kept the lock from 'clicking'.   Eureka!  (O Boy!! Movies in the future.)


From the seats she looked naked.

The rest was easy. I could hear the 'news' was on so I waited for it to finish and  I went in during an ad change over.  It became rare for this not to work and it was even rarer to get caught.  Anyhow, if you did get caught they just threw you out.  I saw all the latest movies that way and usually had a nickel or dime for refreshments.. But then, that first day was special, because it was burlesque day, with live theatre, featuring Sally Rand and her Fan.  (If you look closely, Sally is dressed in a skin-like dress, but from a seat in the audience she appears to be nude.) 
Wow, Wow, Wow.





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Stay out of my Country

While I was changing channels on my tv I saw this beautiful, articulate, Hispanic young lady answering questions and participating in a political discussion. The young lady I was watching was Miami's own Ana Navarro. It made me realize how difficult the political problem is, in the Miami area. She knows the leadership of the GOP does not like people who look like or sound like her or her family. She is from a group of habitual Republicans who are loyal to the cause of what they wish Republicanism stands for.

Stay out of my country?

Both of our political parties are driven by the insatiable desire for power that drives politicians. Their attitude for the most part is, get out of my way. Or, rather, don't look at what I do, just listen to what I say and vote for me. That didn't just happen overnight.  My take on what has happened in today's GOP, is this new, 'lie in your face' tactic. You know, when they know the person they are lying to, knows they are lying.   Yet they lie anyway. That used to be unacceptable in U.S. politics..  And it seems there is a real danger of this becoming endemic to the leaders of the GOP, if it hasn't happened already.. The 'cowardly' Democrats, on the other hand, seem to shrink whenever they lie. It causes the Democrats so much stress that on occasion they will actually do what they tell you they are going to do, even if it benefits the country at their expense. The new ingredient in the GOP is they think they have discovered a way to keep obvious lying from being held against them at election time. Like, you know, repeating sound bites over and over again, especially those that will appeal to the voters emotions, or worse base instincts.  This has made the GOP a haven for almost all the haters, racists and bigots in this country. And a get rich quick method for noted so called 'conservative' speakers or broadcasters when they join a scripted channel.  All you gotta do is follow the script.

Speaker Boehner and Mitch McConnell

They figure tactics will overcome the blatant rash of 'in your face' lying.
The immigration example, getting Hispanics to vote for the GOP, is no more difficult or different for them than getting senior citizens to vote for the GOP. Including some of those who know starting the Social Security program in the U.S. was the result of a war between the GOP (against) and the Democrats (for). And like the Civil War for some in the South, for the GOP in the South, its still being fought. That war, with the GOP, who opposed Social Security from the git go, is still a tough fight. Imagine if the GOP had successfully privatized Social Security, prior to the economic disaster induced by Cheney & Co. in 2008.  Imagine what would have happened to Social Security if the GOP had actually invested the Social Security funds in the stock market, before the melt down in 2008.
My father's father was born in Europe and my mother, who was born in Scotland, came to the USA at the age of eight. But that is not the main reason I am on the Immigration Reform side of the Immigration War. Its my experience with Hugo that was so heartbreaking.
At age eighteen there was not a more admired student graduating from Miami Beach High. If a Republican judge, with a deserved reputation for sending people back to where they came from, who  represents the 'Stay out of MY Country' thinking of the GOP leadership, could send Hugo back to Columbia, then you should recognize this GOP shit for what it is. 
If what that judge did had happened during the school year you would have seen demonstrations at Miami Beach High similar to those that occurred in North Miami when the Hispanic High School Valedictorian was threatened with deportation. To kids, 'right and wrong' is instinctive. To the politicians who are using every tactic to sabotage Immigration Reform, its just another way of pandering to the haters, who seem to dominate, when it comes to influencing the GOP.  
Ana, many years ago I met a Hispanic young man with political ambitions and I asked him why he was running for political office as a Republican when he had said he was a Democrat.   His answer was, "I don't like the Representative in the district and if I run as a Democrat I would have to run against him in a primary with no chance to win. As a Republican I can be on the ballot right away in the general election, because he has no opponent."   His thinking was very clever.  He did not win that election but he represents many who used the same thinking to enter the political arena in our area, and many of them did get elected.   The Hispanic population in Miami grew fast and became the way for individual Hispanics to enter politics.  And thus was born the GOP Hispanic influence in Dade County.. So I don't have much political advice for you except, life is a game and as in all games there are people in it. And some people do shit because its in their DNA.   And some because of their lust for power and money.  And when they join together and make enticing gestures for you to come on their side it can be hard to resist.  So keep doing what you are doing as long as you feel its sincere and if some 'Stay out of MY Country' GOP people get elected with help from your efforts, well, that's how it goes in our political system.

Maybe some day the GOP leaders will discover how much good has happened in our country because of dedicated people, some of whom talk with an accent, and who look just like you, and like everybody else who became part of who we are.  Because of the chance they got when they came here, most became citizens.  Just like so many of us, or our parents, or their parents..

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